A puppy and some lunch

I've really been doing a lot of thinking the last few days. I am so tired. I'm tired of getting my hopes up and being let down. I think the last straw for me was my appointment the other day with my fertility doctor. Several months ago we did some tests, dna and genetics, and after we got neck deep in the adoption stuff I never went back. He called asking me to come in. So, he said that one of my tests came back pretty grim. My 13th and 14th chromosomes are twisted. This is passed on to every 3rd or 4th egg. If fertilized this could cause major birth defects. The only real chance of concieving on our own is with donor eggs or embryos with IVF. We had given up on this a long time ago, I just think that it just added to the stress. It just bring back that we will never have a child that is ours. I cannot give my husband a child. Anyway, I'm beginning to thing we need a break. Maybe a vacations and some time off from babies and the stress. Maybe we should just get a new puppy...... Kellie when is lunch?

Where do we go from here?

What do you say when you feel like your dreams have just died? I haven't heard anything new yet. I talked to Erica a few days ago and she said that they were trying very hard to link their domestic clients to a new agency who will finish their adoptions for the same amount of money that was owed. She said that we would know more in the "very near future." Am I supposed to trust them to just hand us over to just whoever? I suppose at this point what choice do we have?
I email the owner of Commonwealth requesting all money we paid to be sent back to us. The response I got back had no sense of urgency whatsoever. Only that they are working diligently to turn over all domestic clients to the yet to be named agency. I think of all the things that we have to do like updating the homestudy again, printing all new profiles. All these things take money. Money we don't have. I have been in contact with lots of people reguarding the class action lawsuit that is taking shape. The problem with that is that it doesn't help our present situation. It could take years for a settlement, if there even is one. I can remember feeling so sorry for all those people who lost everything with the first agency we were with. I thought that this would never happen to us. I guess I thought wrong.

Devastated and furious

For those of you that haven't heard yet, Commonwealth has decided to "cease providing adoption services". We have been completely blind sided by this. They have offered to had us to another agency, but no money back. What that means for us is that this very well be the end of our journey.....Pray for us and everyone that has been affected by this.